No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
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