Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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