walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
