Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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