I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize