Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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