Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
