dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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