Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
