Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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