I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
