I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
