this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize