Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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