me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize