a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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