i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize