i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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