Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
