If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
