I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
