Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
