He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
