Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
