Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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