He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
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