I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
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