I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
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