I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
