Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Randomize