Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
