You really coming over, don't trick.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
