Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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