Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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