Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
