can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
this hospital has no fireball
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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