Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
