Acid is not a monday night drug
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
