I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Randomize
