D3 body, D1 cock
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
is that a dick in a sweater?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize
