you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
