Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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