i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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