talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
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