How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
