then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
