the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
