My nipple is on Facebook.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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