My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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