you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
