Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
