Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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